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Modern permissiveness and the new culture of entitlement allows disturbed people to reach adulthood without proper socialization. In a book meant both for the general public and for professionals, bestselling author and psychologist George Simon explains in plain English:
•How most disturbed characters think.•The habitual behaviors the disturbed use to avoid responsibility and to manipulate, deceive, and exploit others.
•Why victims in relationships with disturbed characters do not get help they need from traditional therapies.
•A straightforward guide to recognizing and understanding all relevant personality types, especially those most likely to undermine relationships.
•A new framework for making sense of the crazy world many find themselves in when there's a disturbed character in their lives.
•Concrete principles that promote responsibility and positive change when engaging disturbed characters.
•Tactics (for both lay persons and therapists) to lessen the chances for victimization and empower those who would otherwise be victims in their relationships with many types of disturbed characters.
- Sales Rank: #65284 in Books
- Published on: 2011-06-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .80" w x 5.50" l, .75 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 256 pages
About the Author
George K. Simon, Ph.D., earned his degree in clinical psychology at Texas Tech University. He has in institutional and private practice for thirty years. Often sought as a speaker and workship leader throughout the USA, Dr. Simon has been seen on CNN , Fox News Network, and CBS This Morning. Learn more about Dr. Simon by visiting his website, http://www.drgeorgesimon.com and/or his popular blogs at http://www.manipulative-people.com
Most helpful customer reviews
218 of 224 people found the following review helpful.
Belongs in your library
By Hjordes Norman
George Simon has a genius for organization. He takes a complicated subject of human behavior and breaks it down to easily understandable subtopics, exploring the gamut of character traits from neurosis to psychopathy. He gives simple, easy to follow strategies for dealing with the manipulative people in our lives, whether they are patients or relatives. He even addresses the concerns of people who have rid themselves of the disturbed character that plagued them and suggests ways to move on.
I was particularly impressed with his chapter on the process of character development and his conclusions as to how character - or the lack of it - affects everyone in our society at every level. It's the most pressing issue of our day, yet seems to be the most ignored.
Personally, I found the book engaging because I have read multiple works on psychopathy, abusers, victimology, narcissism, etc., even scanning the DSM IV on and off for years trying to pin-point the pathology of a disturbed character in my life. He didn't fit into any of the boxes in any of the books. Finally, in Simon's first book, "In Sheep's Clothing," I found my answer. I was thrilled to find an author who understood those people who do have a conscience but act as if they don't because it is so underdeveloped, and who could explain to me how to deal with them.
By the way, if you've read the 1-star review (I always start with the lowest review, myself) you'll probably have come the conclusion I did: that the reviewer has...issues. Yes, Simon does say that disturbed characters refuse to submit to any authority, because they want what they want now in the easiest way, and they want to "win." They have great insight, and understand that others in our culture submit to a "God," a "higher authority," or the will of "society." They just refuse to do so. So yes, the word "God" is in the book, along with many other words.
Laypersons and professionals will both benefit from this book. Enjoy!
93 of 94 people found the following review helpful.
Dispelling the myths about mental illness
By Harrison Koehli
The time for this book is way past overdue, and Simon's subtitle couldn't be more appropriate. Character disturbance is the phenomenon of our age, plain and simple. What does that mean? Well, in a nutshell, Dr. Simon defines character disturbance (and their more intense form of character disorders, which includes psychopathy) as the degree to which people LACK specific virtues, ethics, social conscientiousness, and commitment to social behaviour worthy of respect. It is the degree to which a person evades personal responsibility, feels entitled to things they have not earned, lies, cheats, cons, and steals. The problem is, our society has become so inured in these narcissistic patterns, to see them for what they are is as difficult as asking a fish about water. They are our new norms, rewarded in business and daily life, while true character is derided as weakness and out of date.
This book is just full of gems and is probably the best primer on manipulation tactics I've read. Simon makes the difference between neurosis and character disturbance very clear and shows how they need totally different techniques in order to correct. The old psychological concepts that were developed in order to deal with neurosis are the ones that are out of date, and are totally ineffective when it comes to poor character. They also lead to a culturally self-reinforcing blindness, where we treat people with extreme character disorders as if they just lacked 'self-esteem', had 'bad childhoods', or are just 'acting out' their own insecurities. As Simon points out, in cases of character disorders, these simply aren't true. The people engaging in such tactics know what they're doing, are perfectly fine with it, and will say anything to convince you they're not as bad as they seem. And as long as such behaviours aren't recognized and dealt with, nothing will stop them. Result? Just look at the amount of fraud and corruption in the financial industry. If they can get away with it, they will.
The book has chapters with very clear explanations of all the concepts, tactics, and disorders, as well as transcripts from some of Simon's own sessions. All are highly informative, simply written, and applicable to everything from teenagers to convicts. Highly recommended.
88 of 91 people found the following review helpful.
Outstanding book
By Jeannie
This is a must-read for anyone going through any part of life with a person who is character disturbed. Understanding how your own behavior and weaknesses contribute to the situation is of paramount importance, and this book will help people understand how to change those behaviors. Getting inside a character-disturbed person's head is a little scary, but this, too is extremely important in order to effectively respond to them. The author knows his topic thoroughly. Great book!
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